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1.25.2012

the hour after waking





























most days i couldn't tell you two things about happiness other than sometimes i am, sometimes i'm not.

sometimes it's there. sometimes it's not.

but this morning, this morning happiness was the quick walk to the corner caffe. the white lunch bag with the bagel-and-egg sandwich. the plastic sip-cup of orange juice. this morning happiness was the quiet apartment and a song on repeat. it was the forgiveness i granted myself for the unmade bed and messy floor. the notion that everything--every action, every thought, every sideways glance is a prayer. distilled down, all is prayer, and i am changed by that. that thought, that knowledge, that eternal and ever-reaching love changes me. this morning happiness was the not-so-gentle sense that everything will work out. the turmoil of excitement sitting pit of stomach for a reason that i am not yet conscious of.


this morning happiness was the hour after waking. when the world was mine and mine alone. and there was no fear. only love. in every action. love of waking, despite exhaustion. love of taking the elevator, and studying the windows across the street. love of feeding my body. of taking this suspended time before the day catapults forward and staking a claim.

18 comments:

forefrontfashion said...

i miss those plastic cups of OJ in NYC. my favorite street cart was on 17th and 1st. i miss those walks to work. i'd take a subway over my subaru any day.

k8te said...

i love a song on repeat, it's my fav thing to do. and i love a morning to myself, esp with a delicious breakfast :)

kristinoffiler said...

I can completely relate to what you're saying. I woke up feeling the same way, treated myself to coffee & a bagel, felt a hint of spring in the air (who am I kidding? That's wishful thinking). Happiness settled in.

I adore this line, " the notion that everything--every action, every thought, every sideways glance is a prayer. distilled down, all is prayer, and i am changed by that."

You're a talented writer and I love reading your words :)

Kristin Offiler

ChinkyGirLMeL said...

Each day is definitely a present. There are days when I just throw my hands up and want to give up but then again I think I have too many things to be thankful for and I shouldn't focus so much on the negative stuff. Each day is a present, another chance to do the things you love and to share some love with others. Have a happy day sweetie.

debbiecutieface.com said...

sounds like the perfect morning<3

Ramona said...

oh the calm of the dawn! So beautiful!

Alexa said...

Your morning was my yesterday. I woke up feeling a peace I hadn't in a while. Everything was right, and for no real reason at all. It just was.

Maria Diana said...

so beautifully written!

Xteena said...

Hi Meg,

I love reading this blog so much that it leaves me wanting more like it, but I haven't found anything that satisfies. Do you have any recommendations of fellow writerly young women?

Brady said...

Every once in awhile I have a morning like this, although I could never articulate it this well.

Lorna Diwa said...

Love this, and captured so well with words.

Elizabeth said...

Lovely.
This morning for me was one of stress and never-ending worry and anxiety at the office.

This passage of yours make me smile and calmed me.

And the bagel looks delish :)

grace said...

i think waking up and reading this was the perfect way to start a day.

Britti said...

"Sometimes it's there, sometimes it's not" - that is so true.

Elsha.Rae said...

love your blog!

Veronika said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Nostalgia said...

I love your blog. I've been reading it for a long time now. You remind me of my best friend so much. SO much. With all the spiritual and love reflections on her life and love for books and writing. I just wanted to mention, that one of her favourite books (I enjoyed it a lot as well) is: "Etty Hillesum: An Interrupted Life the Diaries, 1941-1943 and Letters from Westerbork". (Apparently, it's not well translated, but still very poetic.)

Kate said...

I've probably said it before, but I feel like this post applies directly to my life. It probably does for everyone, now that I think about it.

For me, happiness today was breaking down a set for a school play with my two best friends. It's always the unexpected things that make you the happiest.