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5.29.2009

a thought she has caught by a thread




so i've been busy mulling over all of your questions.

and there's one i keep coming back to.

because do you remember when le love posted this video?

i became unbelievably taken with it.

and i began to play the song ad nauseum. 

i've yet to tire of it.



so when Thao asked, what song lyric best describes you...well...


Sun been down for days
A pretty flower in a vase
A slipper by the fireplace
A cello lying in its case

Soon she's down the stairs
Her morning elegance she wears
The sound of water makes her dream
Awoken by a cloud of steam
She pours a daydream in a cup
A spoon of sugar sweetens up

And she fights for her life
As she puts on her coat
And she fights for her life on the train
She looks at the rain
As it pours
And she fights for her life
As she goes in a store
With a thought she has caught
By a thread
She pays for the bread
And she goes...
Nobody knows

Sun been down for days
A winter melody she plays
The thunder makes her contemplate
She hears a noise behind the gate
Perhaps a letter with a dove
Perhaps a stranger she could love

And she fights for her life
As she puts on her coat
And she fights for her life on the train
She looks at the rain
As it pours
And she fights for her life
As she goes in a store
With a thought she has caught
By a thread
She pays for the bread
And She goes...
Nobody knows

And she fights for her life
As she puts on her coat
And she fights for her life on the train
She looks at the rain
As it pours
And she fights for her life
Where people are pleasently strange
And counting the change
And she goes...
Nobody knows


"Her Morning Elegance"
Oren Lavie

of course. 





(this big break here is
my Shakespearean pause.
it's meant to indicate a
substantial period
 of silence. so please do
observe while
mentally reading this
aloud.)







of course. 




i am fighting for my life. 

aren't you?

so last week, when i wrote this about how actually ned's not so bad and i'm thankful he's making me who i am...

well the next two days i could hardly breathe. the fight against ned became so intense that even breath failed me. 

and i fought for my life. 

and  i knew. i am who i am in spite of ned. not because of him. and i don't need to thank him for anything. to hell with ned. 

every day is a fight for my life. my life. versus the life ned would have me lead.

and putting on my coat. and getting out of bed. and getting on the subway. and smiling. and sitting down for a meal. and standing in front of a camera.

i fight for my life as i do all of these things.

but i am. i am fighting. and that's something.





and even more than that...i think i'm starting to  win.





Plato got it right, Be kind...for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. 

When my mother taught me driver's ed we followed one maxim above all others. When another driver made a really glaring error, we always said, oh that must be their one mistake for the year. 

So when the man on the subway is nasty, or the patrons at my job, or the girl in front of me at the supermarket, I try to remember two things now: they are fighting a battle too. and it's most likely their only nasty moment of the year. 


image via visualize.us



don't know what i'm talking about
because you don't know who ned is?
check out my sidebar. i've left you
some clues there. happy searching.

15 comments:

Laura C said...

This was exquisite. Must listen to that song:). Keep fighting, you're kicking ned's trash.

Jayne said...

i LOVE LOVE LOVE that song! :-) great minds think alike.

keep fighting the good fight, girlie.

Anonymous said...

How absolutely stunning that is... and your words brought a tear to my eye but not because I was sad for you but because you are so empowered and I hear it behind every word...
"I try to remember two things now: they are fighting a battle too. and it's most likely their only nasty moment of the year."

This is so true and will apply this to my everyday life from this day forward.

Wondering Helen said...

Oh gosh, this is beautiful. I think you've just made me a better person ... I often forget that we all have these battles, battles we are trying to conquer every moment of every day.


Oh, Meg, thanks so much.

Unknown said...

megggggg. this made me think of you. and acting breaks. xoxo.v
http://img.visualizeus.com/thumbs/09/05/03/kurt,vonnegut,quote,art,cello,dreams,quotes,self-5ccfd1bd58c45cc578aa35030ec2c6bb_h.jpg

Unknown said...

+ i didn't mean like, acting makes your soul grow, so DO ITTT. i think there are lots of little arts of life. that make our hearts big.

Ashley said...

That's probably why I enjoy being nice. It makes my day when other people are kind to me for no reason... life is hard, why not make other people's lives easier by being kind!

You are great, Meg. You can definitely win.

Belen said...

ahh, my goodness, i love that song. i took me a while to realize why i knew it... i blogged about it not too long ago, lol.

RatalieNose said...

This was truly inspirational Meg.
Thank you.

Thao said...

Oh, Meg. Of course that was beautiful. Because you couldn't write anything that wasn't. Thank you for answering so thoughtfully. We're all confident that you're winning the fight.

Kelly Ann Takes Photos said...

Hey there

Just wanted to say that I LOVE your blog. You're writing is amazing, i love reading all your posts.

You sound like a fighter so give life and Ned the 1 2

sarah-lucy said...

That was so beautiful and so true.

Thank you for the gift of this blog.

kate said...

i loved this. i needed this. thank you.

kathleen said...

You are incredibly brave and lovely. Keep fighting.

Meg said...

I stumbled upon your blog a little while ago and love reading it. Your honesty is admirable. You must check out this youtube video about this song. It is amazing!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_HXUhShhmY

Oren Lavie's Her Morning Elegance

Enjoy!